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I am terrified when my eighth graders start talking about sex. Many of them are sexually active, and some have been that way for a couple of years. If you ask their parents, none of them are having sex. The kids say otherwise. Now, I'm not stupid. I watch TV. I listen to the radio. Sex sells, and it's pushed at these kids 24-7, The consequences of sex are rarely addressed, and only in a limited fashion. My students have a tough time figuring out the consequences of any of their actions, so they don't think much beyond the pleasurable aspects of sex. Here's what I propose: a REAL sex-ed program. *Start by having actual teen parents come in, with their children, and tell the kids what it's really like. Then have the parents leave, but the babies remain. Let the eighth graders try to take care of a baby for about an hour. Most will be horrified. Make sure to include teen fathers who are stuck paying child support for the next eighteen years, sometimes for multiple kids. *Get a free clinic staffer to come in and show the kids exactly what STDs can do to your body. The more graphic, the better. (Anyone want to invent a virtual-reality system to simulate gonorrhea? Didn't think so.) * Have people with full-blown, end-stage AIDS talk to the kids. They should look every bit as ill and miserable as they are. (I've lost five former students to AIDS. My current kids think AIDS can be cured. They have a hard time understanding the concept of an incurable, fatal disease.) * Let Colin-G come give the same dating talk he created for his boys. My favorite maxim is still, "Don't stick your dick into anyone crazier than you." * For the parents: install hidden video surveillance systems in their homes, to let them see what happens while they are at work. Prom night isn't dangerous; the hours immediately before and after school are. * Another whole day should be devoted to rape and sexual assault. I've taught a seminar for kids before (after school and at a church) that opened some eyes, especially the stats for rape and assault with boys 11-16 as victims. Date rape is also something to hit hard, since most rappers push it as a good idea. Why would I, an English teacher, want to see all this? I'm tired of seeing my former students struggle with the consequences of sex. No one really told them what life would be like with a baby at 16 (or an abortion), an STD, AIDS, post-traumatic stress disorder, or jail time for acquaintance rape. I wish someone would care enough about them to be honest with them. Their parents aren't doing it; their churches are trying, but not willing to confront some of the ickier issues. The media romanticize sexual aggressiveness, and give it the cool factor. I wish someone would give the kids reality. I'm tired of worrying about them. (Hey, do the math:110-150 kids per year for 17 years is a lot of worry. No wonder I'm gray-headed.) |
 
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Sex soapbox