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My parents are going insane. I come from a nice, conservative, middle-class home. Cute little apple-cheeked, silver-haired, pie-baking, baby-cuddling mom. Sweet, tubby, mostly bald dad, who excels at making popcorn and teaching kids to fish. Mom worked as a secretary, Dad retired from the Navy, then programmed computers. Took us all to church on Sunday. Made us brush our teeth. Nice folks. They're retired now, living in the Great Rainy Northwest, my dad's native turf. My silent middle brother and his lovely wife and son live out there, too. Mom and Dad seem happy there. They're losing their minds. My dad is a musician; he taught at the Navy School of Music in Norfolk for years. He's a percussionist, arranger, conductor, and a real nag about staying on key. (He has perfect pitch.) He's played in dance combos and jazz bands for years, and conducted a decent community band when he still lived here. In his new home, he spends summers fly-fishing, and winters playing in every kind of band you can imagine. He recently became the new conductor of a pretty large community orchestra, too. Planning a big fall concert of John Williams music. Here's the crazy part. I finally get through to my mom, who is tying up her phone line playing mah jongg on her computer. She's addicted. When I call her, I hear wailing in the background. Thinking it's my nephew, I ask her why the baby's crying. "That's your daddy," chirps my mom,"practicing his violin." Now, this is my dad, who believes that Real Men play timpani, not catgut. That snare drummers are the coolest guys around. That Mozart was a fairy. He hates strings. But it seems he's finding his Inner Violinist, to better understand his new band. They've both lost it. They're coming to see us all in November, after my youngest brother and his amazing wife deliver up nephew-baby #2.I just hope daddy leaves his violin home. On the Yucky Stuff front, tomorrow is a full day of teacher indentured servitude. 7:30 to 5:30. Fun little activities involving zippy slogans and construction paper. I can't wait. On de Headbone: Airhead, Thomas Dolby Book: Tomoe Gozen, by Jessica Amanda Salmonson. Fairly decent fantasy based on the life of a real, female samurai warrior. Ass-whuppin' goodness. |
 
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Violin, lin, lin, ohhhhhhh!