Whywhywhywhywhy?
2006-02-27 7:34 p.m.

Why would a parent believe things I say in person that she wasn't willing to believe over the phone?

Why would a grown man allow two little girls to play smashemup racer with child-sized shopping carts at the supermarket, especially after the little girls plow into multiple fellow shoppers?

Why did Casey poop in two perfect parallel lines across the kitchen right before I got home today?

Why do my male students incessantly chew on non-food, non-gum items (straws, rocks(!!!), paper, pen caps, rubber bands)?

Why was Max the neighbor dog jealously guarding a pine cone this morning, only to leave it (gnawed) on my front step, like an offering?

Why was the store completely out of asparagus?

Why would you paint what appars to be a redneck version of Hobbiton on your garage door? (down-the-street neighbors)

Why would anyone want "Apple Bottom" written across their bum?

Why do my three identical pairs of Levis fit totally differently?

Why am I buying jeans made in Mexico and Colombia?

Why do I love Spiderman and Supergirl, admire Wonder Woman, but loathe any and all Green Lanterns?

Why are my brakes making that noise?

Why doesn't anyone believe me when I say I'm taking off points for spelling?

Why does my hair grow so fast?

Why does Donald Trump DO that to his poor hair?

Why do the rabbits love my yard?

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